Monday, April 25, 2005

I am cranky, tired and pissy.
Apparently this weekend was more emotionally draining than I had thought, which has resulted in me being short tempered, anti-social and obnoxious.

Dad and I had a great trip back to Charlotte- we were both really happy how the weekend turned out. Jason met us in Gastonia and had even stopped by and gotten me Jack in the Box egg rolls because he knows how much I like them and he wanted to do something nice for me.

Unfortunately Nana feeds us constantly when we visit and I was stuffed. we then went to his families house for Sunday Dinner.

Afterwards we all went into the family room to have Family Home Evening, which is where it all started.

Disclaimer: This story is completely juvenile - I realize this.

I wanted to use Jason's pen for the lesson portion of the evening and he didn't want me too. I still wanted too and he still didn't want me too and convinced his dad to give him the pen (because it didn't actually belong to him until then). I proceeded to pout and glare at Jason for the rest of the evening and demand constant attention in the form of back scratches and would get pissy when he paused.
The confusing thing was that I wanted the back scratches but I was angry at him and didn't want him leaning on me.
The second thing that just didn't help the evening was that the lesson portion of the evening was to write down instances where my prayers have been answered. We were told we didn't have to turn them in so I willingly participated.
It was at the end of this portion that Sis. Heilpern announced that we would go around the circle and share one of the instances.
If I wanted them to know these things I would have already told them.
I was irritated and felt pressured - so I went through my list and picked out the lamest one and "shared" that one.
(In case you couldn't tell I am still cranky, tired and pissy).
I dislike telling stories at Jason's house because it turns into a "top this" event. I may or may not be making of this than it was but that is what it felt like.
After the closing prayer Jason asked if I enjoyed the lesson and I told him the truth, that I didn't, so know he thinks I've got some spiritual issue and is all concerned.
(Cranky, tired and pissy)
He asked again this afternoon if I really didn't like last night and was still concerned when I told him "no".
We have been asked over to a friends house for FHE and dinner and I don't feel like going. I feel like crawling in bed and staying there until work tomorrow. I don't have a problem with our friends I just don't want to go anywhere, but they wouldn't understand. It would turn into a huge deal where I "never go over".


Matthew said...

It's really hard to manage stress responses when in overload mode. I can certainly relate to your situation. I just hope I can get through the workday without going psycho on some innocent person.

I recommend excercise. Rock climbing or extra running. Either that or crack =)

Jonas said...
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